Now he's 5!

The day has come when my "baby" is no longer a baby anymore. He's not a toddler, or a preschooler, but a real "little boy." He no longer needs diapers or pull-ups or a sippy cup. He can feed himself, make his own bed (granted, not very well), get dressed by himself, put on his own shoes and socks (though he hasn't learned to tie laces yet) and can pour his own cereal into his bowl (though I still help with the milk). He can express he needs, desires, wishes and dreams. He can almost ride a bike without training wheels. He draws wonderful pictures full of details and can tell amazing stories. He's beginning to hold his own with his older (bossy) sister, but still gives in to her much of the time simply because he is a peace-keeper and doesn't like to see people unhappy. After a bit of a socially rocky start, he's found his niche among his classmates in preschool and is universally well liked.

My "baby" has developed into this amazingly caring, unbelieveably sweet, stirringly sensitive and highly inquisitive little person.

How can it be that just 5 years ago we went into the hospital anticipating meeting this new little stranger who was going to become a part of our family. We had so many unanswerable questions about who this new little person was going to be and how he'd fit into our family. How could we love another child as much as we loved our first? Who would he look like? Would we love having a son as much as we loved having a daughter?

These questions seem so ridiculous now in retrospect, but at the time they were truly thoughts that were going through our heads. Five years later I feel we know the answers to those questions, though now we have so many more. We know having a son was one of the greatest gifts I could have ever received. I love having a daughter, but I truly believe there is also something very special between a mother and son. Had I had my choice, I would have chosen a 2nd daughter and every day I'm so grateful the choice was not mine to make. Furthermore, to have been blessed with such a sensitive, caring and truly sweet little boy has enriched my life more than I can ever express. As for how he would fit into our family, well, I can't imagine our family without his kind heart and generous, giving nature.

It was impossible to imagine as I first looked into the face of this newly born screaming little stranger 5 years ago today, what a gentle, soft-spoken tender hearted little man he would grow up to be. As for what kind of little boy he'll be in another 5 years, I can't really say. So many new experiences and changes lie ahead of him and all of us and it's hard to say how they will effect him. I'm really nervous about his starting Kindergarten next year. He's so young, so sensitive, so innocent yet, and I worry that he will start to lose those qualities, qualities that I see as such an integral part of who he is. I hope that isn't the case. I hope that while he is bound to grow, change and develop that he will always stay a bit my "sweet little boy" forever.

What's really appropriate?

Last week Alyssa came home and told me the following story. We have had some good laughs about it already and thought I'd share with you too.

Scene: We are in the car on our way to Gymnastics

Alyssa: Mommy, something bad happened at school today.

Me: Oh, what happened?

Alyssa: At recess we were playing soccer and one of the other boys kicked the ball really hard and hit another boy in the nuts.

Me: (a little surprised and quite amused at her using the term "nuts" since it's not one we've ever used at home) Oh dear. Did he cry?

Alyssa: Yes. He was really crying. Clay ran to get the playground teacher.

Me: Oh dear. Well, that was the right thing to do. That can really hurt. But, what are "nuts"?

Alyssa: That's the word for his "boy bits" or "privates". (wait a few beats....... and after some serious thought...) But I think it's not appropriate to say "boy bits" or "privates" at school, you just say "nuts."

(!!!) LOL

I simply had to laugh. Though I did correct her and say while "nuts" isn't a bad word, it's really more appropriate to say "privates" or "private parts" instead.

Not sure if it translates well to the written word, but let me tell you, her delivery was just TOO funny. She was so serious about the fact that it was more "appropriate" to say "nuts"!

Early Dismissal Days

Today is one of those Early Dismissal days from Alyssa's school for parent-teacher conferences, and perhaps I'm a little crazy, but I'm actually enjoying having both my children home with me for the afternoon. Granted, ask me by Friday and I might be visualizing a "happy place" where both children are in school for 6 hours a day, but right now, this minute, I'm happy they are home.

Perhaps it is because I just signed my "baby" up for Kindergarten next year just last week and it's becoming clear that time is flying faster than I'd care to admit. Possibly it is because I've been having to contemplate finding part-time work due to hubby's unstable work situation and it's dawning on me just how fortunate I've been to be home with my children these last few years. More likely it is because at this very moment they are playing so beautifully together, proof enough of that is that I'm able to type more than one sentence without interruption. Whatever the reason, I'm feeling a bit nostalgic for the days when we actually had more playtime together during the week -- before my daughter went to school full-time.

It's truly a case of "the grass is greener" though, isn't it?

I'm sure another SAHM who is the thick of child rearing with two young preschool or younger children, must think I'm a bit off for not rejoicing more in the time away from children, than mourning the lack of time with them. I certainly felt that way at times when I was busy at home with two young children; and don't get me wrong, there are many days after sending one off to preschool with his father and putting the other one on the bus for school, that I come home, pour myself a cup of tea and rejoice in the peace of my quiet, empty home.

There are certainly days that I'm extremely grateful my children have reached a level of independence that grants me the freedom to sit here and share a few thoughts, indulge in a cup of tea and sneak a personal moment during the hectic day. Yet it is also dawning on me that these same freedoms are paid for in the currency of less down-time for my children, less time for them to play together as they are right now and, most significantly, less snuggle time and play time for us together.

So call me crazy, but I'm grateful today is a half-day of school and that spring break is coming in just a few weeks. We have no big plans, but that's ok. In the end what really matters is simply having time. Heaven knows it flies by much too fast as it is.

Nikolaustag 2008

Nikolaustag 2008
Originally uploaded by Starrbyrd

Once again it's that time of year when we put our shoes out and hope that St. Nikolaus comes to fill them.

As you can see, we must have all be good this year because our shoes aren't empty. Alas I admit, my shoes would have been empty had I not filled them with a few items myself.

This year I went to both of the children's schools and talked to each class about our traditions and about putting out our shoes before giving each child a small treat bag to take home. I think both Alyssa and Tristan enjoyed being in the spotlight among their classmates and enjoyed sharing something with their friends. I, of course, enjoyed being back in the classroom, especially in this capacity, rather than having the full responsibility of teaching.

As I was walking through the halls of the school it struck me again how all schools have the same, very distinct smell. It's like that smell takes me back on a flashback of all my school experiences, both as a student and a teacher. I know I always loved that "school smell" and sometimes wonder if it wasn't what lured me into becoming a teacher in the first place. I doubt I'll ever go back to teaching but hope that I can continue to volunteer regularly and get my school fix that way.

Did you remember to put YOUR shoes out tonight? If so, I hope they were filled with something wonderful from someone you love!

Life lessons 101

Life lessons 101
Originally uploaded by Starrbyrd

Sometimes the person you have a crush on doesn't feel the same...

Translation: I love you Clay. Love Alyssa

It seems her love goes unrequited however...

Menu Plan Monday

Monday - Rotisserie Chicken, Mashed potatoes, gravy and vegetables
Tuesday - Tilapia Fillets/Fish Sticks, french fries, coleslaw
Wednesday - Homemade Chicken pot pie
Thursday - Chicken and wild rice soup, beer bread
Friday - Left-overs
Saturday - Dinner out?
Sunday - Pork Loin French Dip Sandwiches

Organization

Slowly but surely I feel like I'm finally getting a handle on my organization in the house again.

When I was alone with Alyssa when she was an infant and Michael was working in Alabama my house was spotless and fairly organized. It wasn't perfect, but it was pretty good. I certainly could have had people over to my house at any time and felt ok about it. My laundry was done and put away in a timely fashion. We had a pretty strict schedule (thanks to Alyssa's sleep schedule requiring her to be in her OWN bed in order to actually nap). My bathrooms were clean. Alyssa's few baby toys fit in a single basket I stored on a shelf of my coffee table in the family room.

Then Michael came home.

How is it that one more person can create so much more mess?

And if one more person was enough, I got pregnant and added another person to this household.

It would be very fair to say that since Tristan's arrival I never managed to catch back up with the cleaning and organization. Heck, the laundry alone for 4 people overwhelms me daily. I NEVER seem to be done with it. Let alone sorting through clothes that are too small to give away, or too big and need to be stored for the future. Yes, clothes are an issue. We simply have too many. I need to address this issue soon. One part of that is going to be turning Alyssa's closet back into a closet and using a closet system to help keep it organized.

The other huge organization project I have constantly hanging over my head is photographs. I have prints and digital photographs coming out my ears. I actually have about 40% of my prints organized by month and year, but when you have boxes and boxes and boxes of prints (and negatives) that last 60% comprises a lot of photos. My digital prints are actually well organized by Year, Month and Week, which is great in some ways, but is a pain in the neck when trying to find a specific photo and not knowing when exactly it was when it was taken.

So my next big project is going to be to backup and re-organize the photos. This time I'm going to go back and actually organize by topic and year. I recently ordered (and partially read) the book Photo Freedom by Stacy Julian which really opened my eyes to a new way to look at organizing, storing and scrapbooking photos.

What I really need to do is go back and really read the book so I can apply her concepts to my own organization. I think this will help me a lot with moving on and actually getting things in albums, though I seem to be moving further away from artistic scrapbooking and simply getting pictures into albums where we can all enjoy them. Unfortunately, I'm one of those people who can sit down and be creative when there is a mess around me. My head is a jumbled mess of ideas already, so I need my creating space to be fairly organized in order to focus on my project.

It doesn't help that the space I've started to carve out for myself to "create" might be undergoing a major renovation soon which would certainly put a crimp on my creating and organizing, but I'm determined to get it "work ready" while I can.

This is just one of the many things that are taking up my thoughts, attention and time at the moment. I have to squeeze time into my already busy schedule to work on them little by little. Speaking of which, my time here at the computer is up. I have vacuuming and laundry calling me.